Reconnecting with myself through music after becoming a mom

Becoming a mom is, without a doubt, one of the most transformative experiences there is. But there’s something people don’t talk about enough: how easy it is to lose yourself in that transformation.

At the beginning, when they’re babies, motherhood takes up everything. Your time, your energy, your body, your mind. Everything revolves around this little human who depends entirely on you. And even though there’s so much love, there are also quiet moments when you wonder: where did I go?

Motherhood can make us feel a little lost, it’s very important to find our way back to ourselves. For me, music became the way back home.

It’s not that you disappear, but you do become a bit diluted, you adapt, you become many things besides yourself, and in that process, it’s completely normal to feel lost.

For a long time, I felt that way too. I still remember the first time I did something just for me again, my daughter was two years old, and until then, I had barely spent any time away from her, not because I didn’t want to, but because it’s not always easy, not all of us have a strong support system or someone we fully trust available all the time. So, planning that small escape required logistics, coordination, trust… and a bit of courage.

I went to Mexico City for a concert. I planned the trip, adjusted my budget, stayed with a friend. It might sound simple, but to me, it was huge. It felt like a breath of fresh air. That night, surrounded by music, lights, and songs that had been part of me long before becoming a mom, I felt something very clear: I was still me.

Since then, I’ve tried not to let go of that thread that connects me back to myself. It’s not always easy, sometimes it depends on luck, whether a band you love is on tour, whether the dates line up, whether you can make it work, but it’s also a choice. A choice not to put yourself at the very bottom of the list.

Because there’s something important I’ve learned: this isn’t an expense. It’s an investment. Investing in yourself isn’t a luxury or an indulgence, it’s a necessity. It’s what allows you to come back with more energy, more clarity, more of yourself. In my case, that reconnection has come through music.

After that first concert, there were more. Four in total over the past few years. Some with company, others on my own. And interestingly, those solo trips, just a day or two, have been just as meaningful. Because when you travel alone with a purpose, like going to a concert, the whole experience becomes special: the journey, the anticipation, the show itself, the way back. You come back to yourself.

I’ve seen Foo Fighters when they returned to the stage after the pandemic, Muse at Foro Sol, Keane in Monterrey, and Stereophonics in Mexico City. And each of those concerts has been more than just music. They’ve been reminders of who I am, of what I love, of what moves me.

And the most beautiful part is that, little by little, this has also started to become part of my relationship with my daughter. She listens to the music I play at home or in the car, she recognizes some songs. I tell her when I’m going to a concert, and when I come back, I show her photos and tell her all about it. I see her getting curious, excited, even saying that one day she wants to come with me. And maybe, in the future, this won’t just be something that’s mine, it will also become a bridge between us.

Motherhood isn’t about stopping being who you were. It’s about integrating that version of yourself into a new reality. It’s about finding ways, even small ones, even if they take effort, to come back to yourself. It might be music, like in my case, or exercise, a hobby, your work, reading, writing, going out with friends, traveling alone or with someone. What matters is that space exists, that place where you remember that, besides being a mom, you are still you, and that coming back to yourself, every now and then, isn’t just allowed, It’s necessary.